A Little Ink Blot

It has been 16 years since I pulled this stunt, but it came back to haunt me this week. All-nighters aren't as exciting at age 37 as they were at age 19. The rewards and bragging rights just don't pay off as well either, and there was a definite lack of cameraderie in my lonely persuit.

A bank officer from whom we are asking for monetary consideration finally returned a phone call. No, she was not aware of the fax I had sent, she had not seen the financial papers I dropped off, she did not remember that particular conversation, so could I get the information to her by tomorrow afternoon, and could I revise the business plan to reflect the changes I mentioned?

18 pages of previous work was now obsolete. All my pages of notes and analysis and day-to-day business planning had to be in final form in just 20 hours. I tried to start at 7pm. Baths, bedtimes, one-more-story hours later and 2 more hours were used up. Somehow, it all worked. I didn't get that rush of nausea and unreality that I remembered. I didn't have to snack and nibble to stay awake. I did complete 21 pages of new material in just 8 hours. By noon the next day, I was very pleased with myself, and I even delivered the printed copy on-time.

Two days later, I loaded 2300 lbs of product into the van in preparation for a two-state delivery Ted needed to make. That took me until 10:30 pm at the Donut Warehouse in Seattle. I had to stop and nap on the way home, and didn't get in until 3:30 am.

Two days later found me anxiously praying my man home from that delivery trip. He hadn't been able to call either evening he was gone to let me know all was well. But he pulled in to the parking space at 12:45, and he was asleep by 1:30.

On a regular basis, I am doing my accounting/bookkeeping work for the Hol'N One Donut Company after everyone else is asleep. Last night it took me until 2 am to finish. Tonight I was done at midnight.

Long ago, I thrived on a schedule similar to this, and pulled a 3.8 gpa half-way through a master's degree (I could have done better, if I could have managed to agree with all my professors pet opinions). Also, that long ago, I recovered in a matter of hours from that same sleep deprivation. Though I remember falling asleep while driving and taking out a few neighborhood mailboxes, there were no serious consequences to consider.

Now, my sleeplessness makes my days foggy, and my driving dangerous. Whole pots of coffee are necessary menu items. I scoff at 6 ounce cups. 32 ounces is a bare minimum for survival. I long for afternoon quiet times. Maybe my girls won't notice that Mommy is the only one really napping. It has been 7 days since that all-nighter. I still haven't slept a full 6 hours in one night. There has been no "catching up" to speak of. And I still don't know if the bank officer approved of my revision. Maybe, I should just sleep on it.